Above image from bratz.com
I really like the fact that you chose to analyze the ways in which the show broke the rules that media normally has in regards to gender, showing how Glee challenges our perceptions. Also, I specifically liked the argument you made about Tina. It may have been a more subtle differentiation of gender yet it is very pervasive in our culture.
I would be careful to hone in on the way you are going to analyze your topic earlier. I was not sure where you were going with your argument until half-way through your third paragraph. Also, although I really like your argument, sometimes it felt like it veered away from answering the initial question. If you wanted to tie in what you were saying more, you could have framed it by stating that the way that Glee chooses to define being female is through female empowerment. This was implied but could have been clearer.
Great choice!
-Heather
PS-Sorry I didn't post this earlier. I talked to Jessie on Thursday because I had to post this tonight due to the power/ internet outages at school.
Kathy:
Strengths:
I liked how you analyzed Mike’s masculinity in this movie, you gave many good examples and proved your point well
I liked how you incorporated quotes on patriarchy, they supported your ideas well and gave me a new perspective on the movie
Needs Improvement:
It got kind of repetitive, since you kept reiterating Mike’s masculinity instead of making new points. You could maybe take some description of his masculinity out and talk about how his masculinity changes through his relationship with Abby. The movie portrays him as becoming the “perfect man” because he breaks his own rules by admitting he likes Abby for more than her body, yet he still maintains his superiority over Abby and remains a strong male character.
You could try and work on your overall organization, since you kept repeating old points instead of making new ones or giving new examples. Also try and explain your quotes instead of just inserting them, however you did choose your quotes well.
Good job, I enjoyed reading this, it gave me a new point of view on Ugly Truth.
One of the things I liked best about your analysis is that I think you hit every point dead on. Your analysis was excellent, and after watching the clip I couldn't think of anything else to add because I think you pinpointed everything! I also thought your analysis flowed really well, as it was very easy to read and follow from beginning to end (because I previously had never seen this show).
There was a point where you referred to Jerry Seinfeld as Jerry Springer, so just be careful of minor grammatical mistakes. I also would have liked to have seen a clear thesis or objective. You make a really great argument, but you never really sum it up or define what exactly you are trying to prove as to what it means to be a man or woman in society.
Overall, great job! I enjoyed reading your post!
This was well done.
A few things:
1. The connection made between the Glade commercial and the Lipsitz reading conveyed a really strong point about American consumerism and societal expectations about femininity.
2. The argument flowed really well in connection to the readings. You also did a great job analyzing the 'big picture' and mentioning that commercials like Glade are not the only form of media representing a dominant ideology.
Two suggestions for improvement:
1. The conclusion may have been stronger if it re-stated the stereotypical role of a female in American society.
2. The paper provided a strong argument and connected perfectly with the readings, but it seemed to turn away from the initial argument (womanhood is synonymous with caretaker)into an argument about why the media maintains this stereotype.
Overall, I really enjoyed reading your piece about the show Everybody Loves Raymond. I would have never thought to examine the relationships between the characters and relate them to the norms of masculinity and femininity like you did.
Excelled:
Your use of the Newman quote supports your examples perfectly to show the relationship between the roles of females and male set by the norms of masculinity and femininity. From this quote you were able to prove that the show depicts Raymond as working and going outside the home while Deborah is the stay at home mom.
The second quote you used also from Newman really helps to prove your point about the fact that Raymond's role on the television show does not typically meet the qualities of the typical masculine man. This shows you that Raymond does not fit the mold which is described by Johnson in is article about typical masculine and feminine characteristics.
Improvements:
One area that i would have liked to see more of is the specific quotes from the show. I think that this would have been able to express better of how they talk and show specific examples of how they go against the norms of masculinity or femininity. Also, i feel that it may have been easier to pick a specific episode to reference for examples.
The second area that I would have liked to see presented differently is the way you talked about both topics. You discussed how Debra and Raymond are both typical which was followed by the idea that they are not part of the norm and do no express certain male or female characteristics. I think it would have been better if you picked on point and argued that side.
I really enjoyed reading your piece and thought that you made excellent points and had great evidence to back them up.
Some things that stood out in your post were the comparison between Shane and Max and your use of quotes to back you up. Speaking about the masculinity/femininity of the two at the same time was a great way to show the characteristics of each and define one of the words (either masculinity or femininity) in terms of what the other is not. I also as I said liked your use of the readings, particularly Newman's quote in paragraph #4, to further defend and prove your point.
I would have liked to see one example kind of fleshed out all the way. In the post, you provided a good amount of them, and all of them fit; it simply would have been nice to go more in depth on fewer. I also would have liked for your overall point to be more clear in the introduction. I did not truly see where your approach was going until later on in the body.
Excelled:
I liked that you used the definition of masculine to add to the strength of your argument.
You had good examples, especially incorporating how gender types affect everyone, beginning with children at a young age.
Improvement areas:
There were a few grammatical errors. Along with this I think you could have used more transition words to begin your paragraphs.
I think your quotes from Newman were important but it seemed as though that paragraph was just quotes. I feel you could have used these quotes for more of an analysis and connection to your points.
I love your writing style. I think your voice is very sarcastic and playful, so it made the reading easier and more fun. It's very suitable for blogging. You're also very clear; I have never watched Friends, but I understood the characterizations and situations as you explained them. So bravo!
However, there isn't much of a thesis. Your opening paragraph is wonderful, but it's not really related to the rest of your paper. I like, for example, introducing the framework of the theatre; but you abandoned the metaphor after the opening. You have a strong opening and a strong example, but there wasn't enough to tie them together.
Excelled
- Thesis is reiterated througout the blog explaining what it means to be mal
and female and how the video is an attempt to shatter patriarchal views.
-There is a clear analysis of the gender roles displayed in the video.
Needs Improvement
-Needs improvement in tying more readings to your analysis.
-I would have also mentioned the male gaze depicted within the video. Her husband
is looking through the looking glass and imposing his biased view. He is the
overseer however we see the Madonna's overseeing in the end. I just thought
it was very symbolic and another way she is finally expressing herself.
Interesting post.
Some things I liked:
1) Great analysis of the song. It fits perfectly with what we've been discussing.
2) Interesting correlation with the Johnson piece.
3) Good use of Pozner as the piece fits well with the lyrics.
Some things that could use improving:
1) Minor grammatical errors
2) You could have maybe used a discussion of hegemony, specifically the use of ideas contrary to the mainstream.
Chris
Excelled:
An effective aspect of your blog post was when you used different examples and lyrics from the actual video to support how women strive for perfection and how they challenge societal norms. I feel as though this evidence made your argument stronger in terms of showing how Pink expresses female norms, yet counteracts them.
You definitely made it clear as to what it means to be a woman by incorporating society’s perspective and Pink’s. Also, you excelled in showing how Pink constructs an understanding of femininity through her video by choosing to reference certain images she includes.
Improvement:
A certain area of your blog post that could be improved is the introduction regarding your inclusion of the definition of hegemony. I feel as though it would have been more effective if you supported it with a direct quote from Lull. In the future, when you first use a term that has been defined by someone else, quote the person right afterwards.
Also, you can improve on using in-text citations correctly. For the MLA format of in-text parenthetical citations, you always put the last name of the author and page number of where the quote was taken from in parenthesis. If the author’s name is stated in the sentence with the quote, all you need to do is put the page number of where the quote was taken from in parenthesis.
Additionally, I think you could have used maybe another quote from both Lull and Pozner to back up your argument even more. Both authors’ works directly relate to your topic, and I think it would have effectively enhanced your post. My suggestion is to look very closely at the readings and pick the most important statements, which you can elaborate on.
Are the New Disney Princesses Feminists?
January 13, 2010
http://contexts.org/socimages/2010/01/13/are-the-new-disney-princesses-feminists/
Lisa
Contexts.org
Modern Family Is Not So Modern When It Comes to Women
March 24
http://www.tressugar.com/Modern-Familys-Gender-Stereotypes-7873760
OnSugar blog
Tressugar.com
The Revival of Feminism: Cher vs. Madonna
April 2010
http://www.more.com/2051/16328-the-revival-of-feminism-cher
Ginger Glynn
More.com
Taylor Swift as Feminist Success
Friday, April 9, 2010
http://www.fourthwavefeminism.com/2010/04/taylor-swift-as-feminist-success.html
Brianna J
Fourthwavefeminism.com
Underwear: What's Feminism Got to Do With It?
Thursday, March 18, 2010
http://www.blogforbettersewing.com/2010/03/underwear-whats-feminism-got-to-do-with.html
Gertie
Blogforbettersewing.com
*I got my browser to work. This is the corrected version of my link hunt.
The Daily Show Takes on the Crisis of Dudes
February 04, 2010
http://www.feministing.com/archives/019919.html
Courtney
Feministing.com
Mounster-ous Advertising: Mounster Energy and violent masculinity
April 30, 2010
http://impersonated.blogspot.com/2010/04/monster-ous-advertising-monster-energy.html
Amelia
Female Impersonator
The first time we kissed I knew I never wanted to kiss any other lips but hers again.
January 14, 2009
http://goldenlasso.wordpress.com/2009/01/14/the-first-time-we-kissed-i-knew-i-never-wanted-to-kiss-any-other-lips-but-hers-again/
Anna
The Golden Lasso
How Girls Have Ruined Playboy
April 05, 2010
http://jezebel.com/5509713/how-girls-have-ruined-playboy
Irin
Jezebel
How Girls Have Ruined Playboy
Who Can Play It Straight?
May 10, 2010
http://www.womanist-musings.com/2010/05/who-can-play-it-straight.html
Womanist Musings
Inspiration from What Not to Wear
May 10, 2010
http://personalchallengefitness.blogspot.com/2010/05/inspiration-from-what-not-to-wear.html
PCfitness
Personal Challenge- Fitness and Nutrition Training
There is Little Originality with Lady Gaga's Shtick, Except That She's a White Woman
May 10, 2010
http://www.starpulse.com/news/index.php/2010/05/10/there_is_little_originality_with_lady_
Jihan Forbes
StarPulse
Requiem for a Dream
January 21, 2010
http://www.avclub.com/articles/requiem-for-a-dream,37297/
Scott Tobias
A.V. Club
500 Days of Summer: Movie Review
July 1, 2009
http://aiyanabaida.com/?p=22
Aiyana Baida
Piece of Mind
Philosophical Monday: The Princess and the Frog
December 14, 2009
http://fierceandnerdy.com/philosophical-monday-the-princess-the-frog-interracial-relationships
Author not listed
Fierce and Nerdy
Deconstructing Lady Gaga's Telephone Video
Mar 15, 2010
http://www.theatlantic.com/culture/archive/2010/03/deconstructing-lady-gagas-telephone-video/37458/
Aylin Zafar
TheAtlantic.com
The Man Files: The Hurt Locker Blows Up More Than Bombs
Mar 1, 2010
http://girlwpen.com/?p=1845
Shira Tarrant
GirlwPen.com
MCSR's College Chapter Breaks Down "Jersey Shore"
April 9, 2010
http://mencanstoprape.blogspot.com/2010/04/mcsrs-college-chapter-hosts-jersey.html
Jared Watkins
Blogspot.com
New Moon, Same Old Sexist Story
November 23, 2009
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/katherine-spillar/new-moon-same-old-sexist_b_367925.html
Katherine Spillar
HuffingtonPost.com
Cosmopolitan Magazine and Gender Stereotypes
August 20, 2009
http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/2063249/cosmopolitan_magazine_and_gender_stereotypes_pg2.html?cat=69
Tara K
AssociatedContent.com
The Ugly Truth (review)
[Friday, July 24, 2009]
http://www.flickfilosopher.com/blog/2009/07/072409the_ugly_truth_review.html
MaryAnn Johanson
FlickFilosopher.com
Textual Analysis: Gender Bias in the Media
[April 15, 2010]
http://popc260.blogspot.com/2010/04/textual-analysis-gender-bias-in-media.html
Paul Barney
POPC 260
Women's Images in Magazine Advertisements: How far have they come?
[August 18, 2008]
http://belisima.i.ph/blogs/belisima/2008/08/18/women%E2%80%99s-images-in-magazine-advertisements-how-far-have-they-come/
belisima
i.ph blogs
On Managing For Equality and Diversity in the Workplace
[April 11, 2010]
http://applyandgo.com/blog/2010/04/on-managing-for-equality-and-diversity-in-the-workplace-by-increasing-opportunities-for-people-with-disabilities/
admin
applyandgo.com
EU to tackle gender pay inequality
[March 8, 2010]
http://blogs.reuters.com/global/2010/03/08/eu-to-tackle-gender-pay-inequality/
Sangeeta Shastry
blogs.reuters.com
