The author has a good introduction, she gets right to the point as to what the problems are and uses sources to introduce her ideas.
2. The author has a strong closing and addresses exactly what she thinks corporate conglomerates or out to do, and/ or who it is directly affecting.
I don’t think that the author has a narrow enough thesis. She begins right off the back talking about the issues, but I never see where she states what she is going to address through out the blog. It is however implied but not addressed.
2. Another idea that I think that this author could work on is the over utilization of sources. Some of the sources where good, but I see that she had several in one paragraph. I’m not sure if this was to make the paragraph appear overtly supported by other authors that could identify with her ideals or not. In the end the blog should be based on your opinions, and then maybe a quote or two to justify all through out the blog or writing. Overall, the blog was very insightful, and I enjoyed reading it.
Saturday, May 31, 2008